


The Chair (coda to SPN 6.15)

by tebtosca



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Crack, F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-05-10
Updated: 2011-05-10
Packaged: 2017-10-19 06:00:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,190
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/197714
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tebtosca/pseuds/tebtosca
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sam and Dean come to a realization with the help of a J2 sextape and a very toppy Gen, as Misha struggles to remain very, very still</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Chair (coda to SPN 6.15)

“Finally,” Gen grumbles as her husband and his insipid co-star open the door to the trailer.

“Oh, it’s you!” Jensen squeaks, but his eyes read more confused surprise than the usual snarky malice. “Why are you in Jens…my trailer?”

She can’t resist an eyeroll as she crosses her legs and sits back against the couch. “Oh, I don’t know, just playing with your dog figurines, the usual.”

“Hi honey!” Jared says haltingly with a short wave, stifling a grunt as Jensen elbows him in the ribs.

Gen glares at them. First Jensen shows up at her house for God’s sake and now they’re standing there acting like they don’t know what it means for her to be sitting in his trailer. Seriously, if Jensen Ackles' ridiculous mouth didn’t look so good wrapped around her husband’s cock she wouldn’t even tolerate this foolishness.

She pulls out her special edition walkie-talkie _(fake leather, animals are friends not fashion accessories)_ and calls her accomplice. “Clif, hon, send him in.”

The door to the trailer opens and the burly bodyguard shoves Misha into the space in front of the fish tank. His eyes dart around like a trapped rabbit and his smile wavers as he fingers the lump of his phone through his pants pocket.

“You know how I said I wanted to be part of the “inner sanctum”? Well, maybe I spoke too soon,” he starts, cut off suddenly by Gen’s snapping fingers.

“Misha, do you really want to spend forever as a loser with no friends?” she asks sternly, eyes narrowing. She crosses her arms against her pushed up chest and laughs internally at the tremor in his shoulders.

“…no?”

“Exactly. Now Misha…”

“Erm, yes?”

 **“Be. The. Chair.”**

Jared and Jensen stare at each other with utterly dazed facial expressions as Gen moves off the couch to allow Misha to sit down. Once he’s set she moves to straddle his lap, her back to his front. She settles in and brings her attention back to them.

“Much better. Are we ready boys?” she says brightly, pulling a remote control out of the thin air and turning on the huge TV screen behind them. Ridiculously pornographic moaning pulls them out of their reverie. They stare dumbfounded at the screen, where a sweat covered Jared has Jensen bent over the coffee table they’re standing next to, pounding his ass so hard magazines are flying all over the place.

 _Jeez_ , she thinks. _They act like they’ve never seen this one before_. Misha squirms underneath her and she catches his wrist just as he’s managing to type “HELP M---“ into his twitter box with one pinky.

“Chairs don’t have hands.”

“Sorry!”

 _God this entire cast is full of morons_ , she fumes. _Kris Furillo wouldn’t tolerate this shit._

“But I thought they….we hated each other??” Jensen chokes, voice an octave he hasn’t reached since he played Eric Brady. Jared is still watching the screen, mouth dropped somewhere around his clavicle.

“Well, yeah, you do. Doesn’t mean that you don’t fuck for my viewing pleasure,” Gen scoffs, hiking up her skirt and pulling down Misha’s zipper with epic multi-tasking skills.

“Chairs are erect,” she barks and Misha’s penis goes hard on cue.

“But I thought I haven’t even been to your house,” Jensen continues, like if he figures out the inconsequential stuff he can ignore the slapping sounds on the screen behind him.

“Of course you don’t come to my house. I hate you,” she says, like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “And it would upset Howard.”

“Howard?” Jared repeats, eyes still glued to where his gigantic penis is splitting Jensen open.

“The alpaca,” Gen and Misha answer in unison, as she lowers herself onto his flushed cock.

“Um, Dean….” Jared trails off, eyes growing wide with what looks like remembrance.

“Role playing, I like it! Keep going,” Gen instructs, thighs flexing as she starts bouncing on Misha.

“Sammy, not now,” Jensen growls, eyes straining to find something else to look at. He settles on the fabulous solid gold globe encrusted with rhinestones in the corner of the room.

Jared is staring at video Jensen, who is stripping his own cock like it’s on fire. “After the shapeshifter. In the motel room. We…Dean….I think I remember. Did we…oh my god.”

Gen cocks an eyebrow at the terrorized look on Jensen’s face. _Since when is he a method actor?_

“Sam, stop it!”

“I remember, Dean, you and me, before you knew about my soul. We….”

“Stop scratching the fucking wall, dammit!’

“Yeah, scratching the wall would be bad. These trailers are super expensive,” Misha offers helpfully, breath short from the exertion of staying still as she rides him.

“Chairs do not have vocal cords.”

“Right.”

Jared on the video starts growling filth into Jensen’s ear as he pulls his hair back. Real time Jared gasps as he listens to it and then turns back to Jensen with a strange look in his eyes.

Gen, bored, finally cuts off whatever actor stuff they are working their way through. “Are you two going to start fucking or do I have to ride this idiot all night?”

Misha squeals indignantly.

Jensen is flushed red straight down to the hollow of his throat and he doesn’t look Jared in the eye. He makes a move towards the door, but Jared pulls him back, one big hand around the back of his neck.

“It’s okay...Dean,” he murmurs, bringing his mouth down suddenly to his.

“What are you doing?” Jensen gasps, but doesn’t pull away and Gen starts moving a little faster with excitement as Misha grunts.

“I remember now. I remember,” Jared says softly. His voice is kinder than Gen remembers ever hearing it and it makes her frown for a minute. She pushes the thought away as she grinds her ass back against the bulky wool sweater bunched up on Misha’s abdomen.

“I’m sorry, Sammy,” Jensen mumbles, closing his eyes as Jared puts both hands on his hips and pulls him flush against him.

“Don’t be sorry. Never be sorry,” Jared replies fiercely, hands slipping to Jensen’s ass as they start kissing frantically.

“Um, Gen, I’m gonna, oh please, really soon, can I, oh god,” Misha’s voice wrecks the silence and the boys break away from each other.

“It was just getting good, you fucking impecile,” Gen hisses at Misha, nails digging into his forearms as she increases her speed.

“Let’s find a way home, Dean,” Jared says, looking at Jensen, voice firm, one hand still touching the small of his back lightly.

Jensen doesn’t speak, but the corners of his eyes crinkle and he nods imperceptibly. They start towards the door as Gen pulls off Misha.

“Jared, where the hell do you think you’re going?? Jensen, you idiot, come back here and perform like the pretty little monkey you are!”

The door slams with finality.

“So did you see where my phone went?” Misha asks, smiling brightly as pushes his wilting penis back into his khakis.

Gen clenches her fists so she won’t punch him. _I knew I should have stayed a lesbian._


End file.
